Article 22


Eating Insanity

By Jean Antonello, RN, BSN, obesity and eating disorders specialist and author 


Based on the notion that calories, by themselves, (i. e. eating food) makes people fat, here’s a list of terms that would be appropriate for anyone following this type of approach:

  • Sugar-free
  • Calorie-free
  • No-calorie
  • Low-calorie
  • Less filling
    More filling
  • Low carb
  • No carb
  • High protein
  • Extra high protein
  • ‘No-fat
  • Low-fat
  • Even less than low-fat
  • Lower than low-low- fat
  • The lowest fat possible but not as tasteless as completely fat free
  • So low-fat that under a microscope you can’t detect a fat cell
  • Cardboard food—no calories, no fat, no sugar, no taste—won’t do anything for you but it won’t make you gain weight
  • Exercise morsels—workout substitutes for negative calorie eating

If we take the current trend in food avoidance to its natural conclusion, we should simply put warning labels on all foods that contain any calories whatsoever. 

This label could read:

CAUTION! This product contains calories that cause weight gain and consequent social discrimination. DO NOT USE this product if you want to be thin enough to be accepted or admired, get a good job or get married to a nice person. Regular use of this product may impair your ability to have any kind of a decent life. • ©Jean Antonello 2018 • Heartland Book Company • website by Joan Holman Productions